Most of my customers get excited when they see me working. It tends to freaks me out a bit cause I don’t know them that well to have them hyped up, right? I remember asking them “why are you excited to see me?”, confusingly. They told me that, the whole building has spoken about the food and drink, I prepare for them. It doesn’t matter if you did it in proper steps, it’s was just too unique for them. Since it was me, I smiled and made them their teas and gave it to them with a huge grin. I was in deep thoughts. I thought they were joking around. I even thought how different the drinks I make from my coworkers to the way I make it. I ended the thoughts by thinking it was some kind compliment. Later on, my favourite customer randomly came and spoke to me regarding his shift and of course his food, lol. As I finish making his food, I told him the story of what the other people have mentioned about my so-called mysterious talent. He told me that they were right and he’s 100% sure that they aren’t joking. I guess the answer to your delicious food and drinks is that I make it with love.
So I officially came to a conclusion to prepare myself to drop out of law school, just to open a tea kadai (also known as a tea store). Imagine how much customers I’ll get just to have ppl wanting me to make their own drinks. I feel soo evil lol.
Sadly, I haven’t came across a tea kadai in Sri Lanka. But in India, they have a ton of them.
So here I am tryna mind my own business and helping people out with their issues even though I’m currently growing in a place where two of my favourite people has broke-up which means I’m having trouble being there for both person and its such a huge pressure. Let’s not forget that my favourite uncle and aunty who I somewhat adopted is leaving me soon which hurts me in so many ways. Cause, I’m not close with any of my relatives except the ones in Sri Lanka and knowing that I am attached to them makes me wanna throw trauma so they won’t leave but it’s me. Trust me, I tried my best to stop being clingy by focusing on myself which eventually worked. Yet, I’m still thinking about them day and night 😦 .Trying to get my lifestyle straight for now…
However, I was told to help someone who trusted me and I did. But it got to the point where the person was trying to control and start picking on me aka emotionally abusing me. Imagine picking on a real-life Satan whose minding her own business. Yeah, that’s how my actual character is. I could destroy a person life within seconds. Since my dad and my fav bros always taught me to be patient and not to be a bitch. I did on what as told. Regardless, how much you try, being a good kid, I hate hearing rumours about me. All those things they plan to do me while the main person is away. How am I suppose to react to it.
Shall I tell the “main person” on whats happening? Will she believe me? Do I go on vacation and break her promise? Or should I just deal with it cause God and Karma exist?
Either way, I’m really liking this new lifestyle. Inhaling the smoke and watching it flow endlessly from my mouth as I’m in serious, with my deep thoughts. My bro has no clue about whats going on cause I decided to be lowkey and didn’t felt like being a crybaby, which I’m naturally am when he’s around. I’m currently insecure and have a ton of acne due to stress and being broken, so most of my soul is packed away til someone can be like
“OMG, You Really Need Me In Your Life!!!“
If I had to be brutally honest, I’ve never trusted anyone or will ever be close with anyone besides my brothers. I don’t ever think they’ll leave me for something else or betray me in any kinds of way. Eventhough, I’m extremely clingy to them and they know that they’re my only friends I got. I don’t think, I’ll get amazing friends like them.
A friend came up to me to warn me about what they had mention to her which is to hurt my feelings by doing certain things to me. The funny part was that she told them that
“Do you really think she cares if you do stuff like that to her “.
I guess that’s something I love about myself. Gosh, I love myself. But Seriously, my anger is still lingering on to me. Why would they wish to destroy me when I did nothing and helped them when they had serious personal problems of their own.
Therefore, I came to a conclusion that I permanently will remain as a bitch. Which means that you won’t be seeing such a thing called a sweet person in my case. According to Wikipedia, it mentions that it can indicate a strong or assertive woman. So I guess, I’m gonna keep that as my nickname. Jokes. I just wanna be me and I decided that I’m no longer talking to anyone and keeping my distance with humans unless I feel like they need someone to talk to. Besides that I should be fine cause like I said from the beginning, I have four amazing bros to annoy the shit out.
Whenever I tell people that I’m a Sri Lankan. People of my kind tend to stare at me weirdly and corrects me by telling me that I’m a Tamil. I do mention elderly Tamil people that I’m Tamil so it would be easier for them to communicate. So let me allow you to step into my life as I post interesting free pics which is not part of my copyright regarding on my journey in life. Maybe it will allow you to understand me a bit better.
So years ago, my mother aka amma planned to give birth to me. Due to Circumstances, my mother travelled all the way from Jaffna to give birth to a Legend, in south Sri Lanka. imagine those fire routes, LTTE and the Sri Lankan army during that time. Seems scary, isn’t it?
Anywayz, I arrived in Canada and eventually got to be exposed to all sorts of religion and was grew up with a ton of amazing Sri Lankan family. I was raised by a Tamil Christian family and Sinhala family. practically grew up with my cousin who was Hindu and family friends that were Tamil Muslims. The best part was that I was in the hands of no harm and was not killed. (being sarcastic and rolling my eyes)
I guess, changing to more than 5 schools seemed stressful cause I was either had more friends, had no friends, bullied or maybe had the world against me. I was upset but I didn’t really give a shit.
When the Tamil genocide started, I was getting bullied by anyone who was Tamil and if you weren’t Tamil, it was your lucky day. I was practically emotionally bullied. Believe it or not, I got to see a ton of false Tamil considering themselves as Tamil Tigers or being a pro-Tamil. Sadly, I’m seeing it on Social media. Even though I was born as a Sri Lankan Tamil and was from Jaffna. Their excuse was that I had to born in “TAMIL EELAM” to be a Tamil. In this case, I wasn’t. As you grow older, you tend to wonder how stupid they were. Cause according to the words they mentioned, they were born outside of “TAMIL EELAM” so they “THEMSELVES” would not be considered as a Tamil. But since it’s me I don’t give a shit. This continued til the world has released a news which is false that “The LTTE Leader has been killed”. However, the Non-Tamils continued to get on my nerves. If I had to be brutally honest, I did got to see the people who truly cared and still managed to be my friends thru all that. btw, this is when I start considering myself as a Sri Lankan Tamil cause I was a teen and was heartbroken. Plus, I wasn’t a huge fan of people picking on the Sinhalese either. That’s how my conclusion to that came.
Recently, I had followed a pro-Tamil person and I actually enjoyed everything til I found out that I felt extremely uncomfortable. Dragging Tamil people down, showing hate towards the light skin Tamil people which felt that I was accepting something that I was personally against. the person was also proving me wrong on why I should become a Tamil and not a Sri Lankan.I was later considered confused and strange to them. I later saw social media celebs showing hate on the word “Sri Lankan”. It was annoying and I personally felt that the Tamil people who were telling the world that they were part of the Tigers got on my nerves. I personally didn’t want hatred. But this is what I can personally say to all those pro-Tamil and false Tamil tigers.
Will do a quick history of our Sri Lankan war regarding on what had happened in a different post.
The Tamil Tigers who ruled Jaffna at the time had people under control. There were “things” that happened but it wasn’t serious. Everyone was under control. No one spread hatred to one to another. Food was given and shared. They made programs where its called a masterclass at the moment where people got to learn thing for free. it was safe for a female to walk down the street knowing that no men would whistle at her. there so much more but it takes a real human to know. I heard a few stories regarding about them and I will accept them since the LTTE leader had apologized back then regarding about the Muslim Tamil. The main point of the Tamil Tigers was that they wanted a peaceful country and have an independent place where we have an actual identity. This has nothing to do with the Sinhalese people at all. Its based on the government, the British royal and the foreigner who raided Sri Lanka. We’re just recreating a new problem for a community where we can end it the easy way. Not all problems are permanent, just remember. The main point of this blog is to show how better us humans can do by being united.
It Takes nothing to join the crowd, it takes everything to stand alone. Hans F.Hansen
I want to keep my blog real. where I can be able to talk about real things like war, money, poverty, love, prostitutes, LGBT, Serial killers, Paranormal, Racism, discrimination and much more….
Maybe change the world and make it a better place. The main reason why people are degrading people is that no one has learned to understand or educate themselves. There’s an actual power to that. I will continue to do make blogs about beauty, my thoughts, lifestyle and food as well as Serious issues that are happening to the world. You don’t need to accept the things I say and I will perfectly fine cause it’s better to be different. Btw, I did some serious research and had interviewed people within that category so you can sense how it is to be standing in their shoes.
P.s. What made me have sudden thoughts like this is that… There’s no point in me studying Law if I haven’t done my part especially when I have power in Social Media.
P.s.s. I think that’s how I would end up looking after I have people arguing and going against me for giving a voice to people who have none.