EP.01: Truly Yours

In a stage where I had undergone hiding, I ended up suffocating within my sorrow. Stranded in the middle of nowhere, I did try my best to grasp for whatever object drifting nearby, not knowing that it would dissolve within my fingers. Helpless for relief and exhausted from breathing, I chose to let go of my life for good. Yet, an unusual kind of flash was reaching my way …

woman on the body of water
Photo by Daisa TJ

Being brought up in a world where darkness never existed. I never knew how negativity felt like. Of course, I got grounded, but it didn’t prevent me from being what I truly am. As a rebel, nothing could have dragged me down, no matter how much a person has attempted. However, happiness doesn’t last long.

Nevertheless, I had received such a lesson in the most crucial way ever. A child spoiled with a ton of love, food and adventures. It didn’t take that long to realize that the person you look up to will be appearing on a different path influenced by love/money. Hopes were shattered, artificial smiles were forever painted on faces; Furthermore, the conversation hardly lasted as long as it should be. Maybe that’s one reason why I withdraw myself from events. Hallucinated of remaining happy and prosperous, yet it comes with ends of its own. I was fighting vigorously to make sure that the individuals I was surrounded by were at my standards. Or was I selfishly fighting against society’s norms?

water droplets on green leaf

Days passed by as my anger gradually grew within me. Watching injustice not being served and my questioning of God being real was becoming repetitious on my mind. I’m a firm believer in never leaving a loved one behind, whether they’re suffering or not? I later got involved in a circumstance where I ended up being a victim of my rival and a target for my temper. Nevertheless, it destroyed me. I ended up severely ill, nearly murdered by my thoughts. Who will ever accept me nor my stories? In bed with no strength, loss of appetite and having trouble inhaling. I realized how beautiful death could be. Yet, God has a plan of their own.

selective focus photography of pink flower
Photo by Min An

The healing process caused a living in my own space extremely comfortable that I had neglected my true self. It permitted me to escape from obstacles. Yet, the truth is that it will always be best to leave the comfort to accomplish specific intentions. I always taught myself never to let go of my dreams, regardless of how deadly the situation is. My milestones consist of a ton of drowning and sometimes being buried under the sea. I did eventually come out alive. The moral of this post is that you won’t see what you’re capable of until you encounter something in life. I manage to take life into my own hands, learn from my mistakes, and observe every red signal that will make me safe in specific issues in life. Perhaps, I meant to stay in the deep end cause I needed to isolate myself for me to rebloom. Just like my favourite professor would always say, you won’t be able to reach your destiny unless you find your weakness.

P.s. I’m aware that this Blog post may be confusing as it has a hidden message for my Special Human.

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Anulakshmi Vaira
Anulakshmi Vaira

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